Using marriage as a gateway to escape a current challenging situation often leads people to leap into a relationship without due diligence. It’s also unrealistic to expect your spouse to ”save you”; after all, they are just as flawed as the next person.” — Smart Single Muslimah, Farhat Amin
I decided to read this book on a whim, after witnessing marital disasters I was completely pessimistic about the prospect of marriage. I couldn’t see the attraction to marriage or a close relationship that so many people my age worship. The whole “wouldn’t it be nice to share my life with someone, a companion, my own, personal fajr alarm.” — as Farhat Amin puts — didn’t appeal to me. So, after seeing multiple reviews of Farhat’s book (and it being on sale) I decided to give it a read, perhaps I’d warm up and be optimistic towards marriage.
The reality is the demographic of youth today has changed from that of thirty years ago, many women work, go to university, find people themselves etc and are we prepared to answer different questions? And not just answering them based on the predisposed secular mindset but from the Islamic worldview. That’s what Farhat aims to do with this book, or at least what I gauged as the reader.This book is not a book on fiqh, but its main addressees are unmarried sisters and parents. It’s refreshing to read Farhat’s no nonsense writing based on Islamic teachings and morals, she also included a useful list of questions to ask potentials. There is currently a warring dichotomy (in the Muslim online sphere) between extreme feminism and the extreme alt-right and both are leaving the average Muslim confused on important life decisions, from an unbalanced perspective. I’d highly recommend this book for sisters in the same situation I was, I thought I was the only one confused, experiencing two separate realities — seeing unhappy married couples or the unmarried Twitter akhs and bints romanticising every moment of the day. Yes I’m a cynic and admittedly I still have my reservations, but this was a step forward alhamdulillah.